Twitter has a 140 character limit, yet I still found a way to tell one of the longest and most obnoxious knock-knock jokes of all time within a single tweet.
I am more proud of this accomplishment than any human right has the right to be.
The dads are evolving
They have learned our technology, they control our communication
friendly reminder this shark week that
– for every human killed by a shark 25 million sharks are killed by people
– when we swim we’re in THEIR habitat
– they don’t even like to eat us we’re too bony, when they do bite us they think we’re seals
– sharks have been around since prehistoric times and now they’re endangered animals because of us
-the media likes to portray sharks as deadly monsters bc they look scary but really we’re the ones killing them
“since prehistoric times” means sharks are older than trees. sharks have existed on this planet longer than trees have existed.
TIL that a cat once co-authored a physics paper. In 1975, a physicist had just finished writing a paper and was ready to publish but realized that he had used ‘we’ instead of ‘I’ throughout, despite being the sole author. Not wanting to edit the paper, he listed his cat, Chester, as a co-author.
Ok but the best part is, physicists loved the joke. When people called the author’s university and he wasn’t available, they’d ask to speak with the co-author instead. The author issued a limited number of copies of the article signed by both authors. (Chester’s was obviously a pawprint.) And to this day, physics papers will often have F.D.C Willard (Felix Domesticus, Chester Williard [Willard was the author’s father’s name]) mentioned in the footnotes thanking his “useful contributions to the discussion”.
failed2be-chill 